I’m not hairy enough to be a bear… yet

I guess I just feel frustrated that our communities express themselves using the medical system’s benchmarks.

13 responses to “I’m not hairy enough to be a bear… yet

  1. I’m noticing more and more how much frustration with labels is expressed on queer blogs/comics/etc. I’ll admit that I probably have no idea what it’s like to have that kind of frustration and sometimes worry about offending people just because I haven’t dealt with it. I don’t want to offend people though :-/

    • No I think it’s a general trend at the moment – a tendency towards blurring the lines and borders of identity that were set up – for me it feels quite an empowering thing to do, and a very interesting conversation to be having 🙂

  2. Hah, tell me about it. My partner is on T and has all the genes for hairiness. He (half)jokes that he’s turning into a gorilla, but wishes he could be a pretty not-so-hairy boy. I, on the other hand, am not on T yet and am probably not gonna be especially hairy anyway (I really love body hair). *sigh* It’d be nice if the physical indicators did not determine who we are to the vast majority of people, even within the queer community. The wider community generally reads as a straight couple….. well, a straight couple made up of two queers; a tomboy/”dyke”/clown type (me) and a queer indie fag type (him).

    PS – I keep reading your blog, and it’s rad! Every single post I read makes me want to grab J (my partner) by the hand and whisk us off to NZ to meet you guys (we’re from Perth, Western Australia) cos you sound so awesome.

    • This makes me so happy! Hairy pretty boys are wonderful! As well as hairless bears! Makes me think of dykes in love with lesbian men, fags in love with their lesbian life partners!

      Happy Happy Happy!

    • Ha! Yeh, I don’t think it’s in my genes to be hairy either, and Joe’s not particularly thrilled at the amount of hair he is growing. I have nooo idea what society reads us as… I think currently we just confuse them! It’s so nice to hear of other guys experiences – especially where one partner’s on T and the other isn’t! If you ever feel like visiting make sure you let us know! We have vague plans to move to Australia in a few years too!

  3. 1) Totally agreed.
    2) If I went on T I’d be an absolute shag carpet. Part of why I haven’t!
    3) Are you a fellow sweater-vest enthusiast?

  4. I reckon. It only matters if you say it does. The other assumption is that ‘how far along you are’ also matters.

  5. omfg it’s so true!

    That’s why I just say I am a dude, or a transman, and people do ask where I am in my transition and I tend to list of the past events… but wtf, here and now I am a guy just like any other and maybe my junk isn’t conventional but what does that matter?

    I see why you draw now, whereas I rant in comment boxes… >.<

  6. 😀 Yeh it seems like that’s the first phrase that people say when they do their youtube vids, and it always strikes me as a bit weird that that’s the first thing they say. I dunno… I just wish that wasn’t the case, it feels quite hierarchical .

  7. i totally agree with you about the labeling- it bothers me when pre-op, post-op, pre-t, etc are treated as the only available categories. i would rather find just the right words to describe myself than try and squeeze into those categories, especially since none of those categories seem to have room for a genderqueer transguy with a love of eyeliner and camp.

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